I wish I had more time…
to write a lengthy entry on a topic of vital importance to humanity, but I don’t.
You see, I have to train for the upcoming marathon I’m participating in. It’s to raise funds to find a cure for prostate cancer. The full marathon is masturbating for 26 hours straight, but there’s a mini marathon that you can complete in 26 minutes (some of have jobs, you know) and for married men there’s the “special” marathon that’s 26 seconds long.
So, I’ve got to don my crotchless skintight jogging suit and practice for a few sets. You’ve got to be in shape. Doing one of these marathons if you’re out of shape or haven’t warmed up will result in a nasty groin pull.
Let’s all cure prostrate cancer. Lend a hand. Let’s all pull together. We can beat it.
Men could reduce their risk of developing prostate cancer through regular masturbation, researchers suggest.
They say cancer-causing chemicals could build up in the prostate if men do not ejaculate regularly.
And they say sexual intercourse may not have the same protective effect because of the possibility of contracting a sexually transmitted infection, which could increase men’s cancer risk.
Australian researchers questioned over 1,000 men who had developed prostate cancer and 1,250 who had not about their sexual habits.
They found those who had ejaculated the most between the ages of 20 and 50 were the least likely to develop the cancer.
The protective effect was greatest while the men were in their 20s.
Men who ejaculated more than five times a week were a third less likely to develop prostate cancer later in life.
Dr Chris Hiley, head of policy and research at the UK’s Prostate Cancer Charity, told BBC News Online: “This is a plausible theory.” (Source)